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Proverbs 31:30 (New King James Version)

Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,

But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

Gentlemen, I know in a society where women put everything on display, even things they shouldn’t, it can be difficult to walk out your faith in the area of dating.  I have listened to enough of you tell me that keeping your thoughts pure is right next to impossible when so many women deliberately or ignorantly walk around with their chichees and butt on display for the world to see. Yes, that word is “chichees.” I spelled it phonetically so that there would be no confusion.  God created you a sexual being. You have more sexual thoughts in a month than some women have in a year.  That is just how your Creator wired you. And it is a good thing.  But the same God who made you, knows your heart as well.  And let me tell you, he would not create a desire in you if he didn’t have a plan already in place to fulfill it.

As a mother of a son, who is entering puberty, I will tell you the same thing I tell him, and the same thing I have warned my single brothers who have come to me for advice on dating and pursuing a wife. WATCH HER CHARACTER. See if who she professes to be matches who she says she is. Don’t involve yourself with a woman of poor character.  I don’t care if she is “fine as hell!” Because that’s probably where she comes from. Don’t think you can “dabble” and walk away.  You will get “got.” To the degree that you don’t is just God’s mercy in action.

I’m not saying that you have to date or marry a mud duck.  If you don’t find her attractive, you don’t find her attractive – pure and simple.  But make sure you know why you don’t.  The same is true for attraction.  If your attraction to a woman is purely physical, then the relationship is doomed from the start.  Obviously, I am not addressing those of you who are out “ho-in.'”  But Man of Substance, hear me today. Hair grays. Boobies and butts sag (you know, unless they’re fake). Skin thins.  Teeth sometimes leave and need to be replaced.  But character, the soul, with proper care and nurturing only improves and flourishes.

So look beyond her shape, to her heart.  Observe her character to see who she is – and be prayin’ the whole time.  If God wants you married, then be sure that he wants you to have a godly wife, who will support your vision and be a help-meet to you.  He wants the two of you to raise godly children, who will impact the world.  You want somebody who is going to come alongside you and work this life out with you, someone who will have your back, cover you in prayer daily, and speak life into your weary soul when the world has worn you out.  You want and need a godly woman. So, Please, please, please, as your sister Christ, I beg you, do not settle for good looks alone.

Follow Sheeri on Twitter! Or Visit her on Black Planet.

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