Dear Church Lady,

Is there such thing as loving your man too much? I love my man and everything I do is with him in mind. The problem is my friends and family think I am crazy, naïve, stupid because he doesn’t have a job or money to pay bills but I am ok with working as many shifts as I have to in order to keep the bills paid. I love him and I accept him for who he is. He has dreams of one day being an entrepreneur and I will support him until his dreams are fulfilled. Being in love has nothing to do with having a job or money and I think people miss out on their true love because they are too focused on the material things instead of the person. I don’t want to sound foolish, but I believe he is my soul mate and I don’t care about anything else. What is wrong with loving your man in spite of what he doesn’t have?

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Signed: Stand by Your Man

Dear Stand by Your Man,

How much you love your man has nothing to do with what’s acceptable to you in your relationship. If you want to pay all the bills and allow him to do nothing, that’s your prerogative. But know this, the way you start out a relationship is the way it will end up. One day when you are sick and tired of doing all the work and pulling all the weight, you will remember what a man is born to do. A man should demonstrate leadership and strength and he is responsible for taking care of his family and those he love. He was not created to sit home and dream while his woman works to make a life for the family. It is important to set standards in your relationships. Know what you want and expect from your relationship not just today but for your future. Stand on it and don’t waiver. So don’t ask the question, am I loving my man too much, am I loving me just as much. Believe me, when it comes to love, you can have it like we want it.

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