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(URLESQUE)  Stupid Superglue! It’s about time they change their packaging, says Irmgard Holm, an elderly Phoenix resident who, following cataract surgery, mistakenly applied Superglue to her eye, thinking it was one of a half dozen eye drops she uses daily.

So, yes, her eyes were glued shut until the paramedics came. Like being buried alive or going blind, but extra pasty.

She’s fine now, but Holm has left an indelible mark on the internet in the form of a soundbyte that can only come from a story this bizarre: “I’m not young anymore,” she says, “but I’m not senile.”